Hopeless Romantic !!

I remember the first time I saw him - it was like the whole world stopped. I was 17, and he was the new kid in school. He had that whole "bad boy" vibe going on, with his messy hair and piercing eyes. I was hooked.

We met in the school hallway, and I swear, it was like the universe brought us together. We talked for hours, sharing our dreams, our fears, and our passions. I knew right then and there that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him.

Fast forward to our 20s, and we were inseparable. We'd spend hours driving around, listening to music, and talking about our future. We'd share our deepest secrets, our biggest fears, and our wildest dreams. I felt seen, heard, and understood in a way I never thought possible.

But life had other plans. We faced ups and downs, breakups and makeups. We grew apart, and then found our way back to each other. Through it all, I held on to the hope that we'd make it work.

People called me a hopeless romantic, and maybe they were right. But I didn't care. I knew that our love was real, and that it was worth fighting for.

As we grew older, life took us in different directions. We found ourselves apart, separated by miles and time zones. But despite the distance, our love remained strong.

We'd spend hours on the phone, talking about our days, our dreams, and our fears. We'd send each other letters, care packages, and surprise gifts. We'd count down the days until we could see each other again.

The distance was hard, but it also made us appreciate the time we had together. We'd cherish every moment, every laugh, and every tear. We'd make promises to each other, to hold on to our love, no matter what.

And when we'd finally reunite, it was like no time had passed at all. We'd fall into each other's arms, and it would feel like home.

Looking back, I realize that our long distance relationship was a test of our love. But we passed with flying colors. We proved that our love could conquer all, even distance.

Years later, we're still together. We've built a life, a home, and a family. We've got our ups and downs, like any couple, but we've learned to navigate them together.

As I look back on our journey, I realize that being a hopeless romantic wasn't a weakness - it was my greatest strength. It gave me the courage to hold on to love, even when it seemed impossible.

So, to all the hopeless romantics out there, don't give up on love. Keep believing, keep hoping, and keep fighting for that fairytale ending. It might just be around the corner.

Cheers and good luck for your fairytale to begin !! 

The Rollercoaster called Life and 3Qs

This is not intended for all you folks who advertise your success and promotions on Linkedin and Facebook but for introverts like me who face nothing but adversities and are challenged everyday for their basic survival. It's a rollercoaster for most of us and I'm not ashamed to admit it. 

Two steps up and four steps down has been the story of my life. So much so that I'm not interested in advertising my success nor admitting my failure. It's mostly failure and may be that's why I feel so. 

Whenever I feel bogged down or hit a wall .. there are only three questions which help me either to feel better or worse about the situation.

First .. Am in control of this situation ?

If the answer is no .. I'm human and feel disappointed but if I'm not in control .. there is not much I can do about it and just think about the consequences when and whenever it occurs. 

Second .. if the answer is yes .. 

What can I do to change it to my preferred consequences ?

I get to action and I regain my best and act on it. 

Third .. the most critical..

Can I do something to influence the decision maker's actions to act on my behalf ? 

This is very tricky and is what mostly occurs when we hit a wall. 

There is no fixed answer to this .. this may be an emotional outreach or a logical alternative or a jugaad out of the template altogether. 

The ultimate idea is not to worry ahead of time and let it ruin your peace of mind. For, if you lose your temperament, the best of your decisions turn into an emotional outbreak and you tend to ruin your relationships forever. 

So chill .. and let destiny take your life ahead. Just address the 3Qs and if you're still unable to sort out your life .. let it take its course. 

Cheers,

See you then next time.

Mayakkam Enna - The magic

Hi folks,

This is not a review or an attempt to be critical of the movie but an honest hard-hitting confession that we fail to acknowledge some masterpieces and give them credit where it's due. 

The magic "Mayakkam Enna"  created by director Selvaraghavan which I as an  idiot couldn’t appreciate during the movie’s release.

From the protagonist's perspective this time. And it's not Dhanush I speak of. It's Richa who stole the show with her stellar portrayal of Yamini. 

Yamini

I was intrigued at first when I met Karthik alias Genius as his friends addressed him. I dated his friend first who had his own problems.. not that I would say that genius didn’t have the same problems.

But attraction is not something derived by weighing pros and cons .. it's just desired.. I hated his gestures and his attitude towards women ..  Me to be honest !!

 

I’m still yet to figure out why I liked him in the first place ..I would share glances at him. I’d go out with his friend only when he was there to accompany us. Genius ! that he was .. he figured it out that I was curious about him rather than his friend.

 

He ran away when we kissed .. long story short ..men realise it only with physical action (not emotionally intelligent)

 

I tried to help him during his struggling days ( I still do BTW) which he mistook as pity and not love as I was still dating his friend.

 

He needed a physical reaction so I did my part when he returned.  But  he was hesitant that it’d ruin his friendship with his friend. So he tried to shy away .. I’ve always had to be the one to take the first step (apologies to all women out there).

 

Marriage

 

Men need to heal themselves first before they get into any relationship.. love or marriage !!

 

But since I’d fallen head over heels in love with him .. I trusted him enough to get married. But as you know,  disappointed men disappoint you eventually. His life, as a failed photographer, failed my marriage too to the point that he turned into a complete alcoholic. We lost our child as well when his irritable behaviour and his self pity turned into an act of aggression. 

 

The easy way would have been to quit this loser and move on but what’s life if you’re not strong. So I strived with this asshole sending his every pic to every magazine known which helped him become successful eventually.

 

I dont’t want to be known as the reason behind his success, just as the support system and pillar to his redemption and healing.

 

You’d never find a person who doesn’t fail. Everyone fails eventually.

 

Just be there. Love them unconditionally. There were times he would physically abuse me as well. I’m not saying that it’s okay to bear all that .. just putting across the fact that everyone is flawed.

 

Make them stronger .. with your presence and your grit. How long could they even not realize ??

 

He did eventually and he is this famous sober photographer who won the international award for the best photographer of the year.

 

I still love him by the way. Strength is what you put up with, not what you’re born with. Become strong because men need strong women even if they don’t realise it.

 

Yours,

Yamini

Courtesy the true Genius Director Selvaraghavan.

The quest for Mr. Perfect

I recall the good old bedtime story nights with my grandma,. She never failed to weave a tale, usually a romantic one, that I suspect was either her own creation or a dream of hers. Little did I know how profoundly those stories would impact me until recently.

Her stories often revolved around a handsome prince who falls in love with a common girl. He would charm her with his looks and wit, sweep her off her feet, make her question their compatibility, convince her they were meant to be, and then elope with her into the sunset on his horse to live happily ever after.

Listening to these fairy tales night after night subconsciously shaped my idea of "Mr. Perfect." I hate my grandma today for planting that seed of "Mr. Perfect" in my head  all those years ago.

I had become that very common girl on the quest to find my "Mr. Perfect" without fully understanding the implications of that redundant story. Looking back, I realise how wrong it was on so many levels and definitely not a baton to be passed on to the younger generations.

The common girl in those stories was portrayed as shy, timid, and unable to stand up for herself. She avoided pursuing her crush, lacked ambition, and believed that love would simply find her. I had unknowingly adopted these traits in my search for Mr. Perfect. 

“Finding love” or rather “for love to find me” had become my sole destiny.

So I waited for my "Mr. Perfect". 

Over the years, many men came close to fitting the bill, but none were quite right. Some lacked a sense of humor, others didn't approach me with respect, and some failed to earn my trust. Some, well didn't go the extra mile to woo me. 

So close but yet so far from my "Mr. Perfect". Undeterred, I continued with my quest.

As I approached my 28th birthday, I realized that my quest for Mr. Perfect had led me down a path that was more about unrealistic expectations than true love. It was time to redefine what I was looking for in a partner and let go of the fairy tale notion of perfection. 

Haunted by these thoughts, I confided in my mother about my quest and grandma’s story. She burst into laughter and asked me if I knew my grandfather. He had died long before I was born so I didn't have much clue. My mother revealed that my grandma’s Mr. Perfect was a drunk retard who fell down the well and drowned to his death.

“Whaaaat !!” I gasped. My mom woke me up from my dream into reality and said “Dear, there is no Mr. Perfect. There is hardly any "Mr. Decent" these days and when you find a Mr. Decent you like, you hold on to him. Mr. Perfect is a myth just like your grandma’s stories.”

My family then found me my Mr. Decent and I have decided to marry him. Hope he doesn’t turn out to be a drunk retard too. Even if he does, I’m definitely not telling the “Mr. Perfect” story to my grandkids.

Cheers! Will be back with another one soon.

Bittersweet - The Finale

 I’m nothing, if not a man of my words and here I am with the Part 2 of Bittersweet as promised – the tale of Aaryan and Sheryl.

Sheryl read his letter and rolled with the thought for about a week, may be a few nights without sleep in her bed too !! Like I said, we have no clue. And Aaryan didn’t want to disturb her and let her come to a conclusion of this relationship on her own terms. But after a week, he just couldn’t resist as he had to leave in a few days and needed a closure. So, he mustered the courage and pinged her, for her to either accept him wholeheartedly or hate him enough to help him move on.

But on the other hand, Sheryl wanted to let him down gently without hurting him and keep him in her life as a friend, which he had been in her head the whole time. So, instead of texting, she was gracious and courteous enough to give him a call to let him know her decision that she wanted no more than a friend in him.

Aaryan accepted her decision but was unwilling to reciprocate. Aaryan was not the type of person to mince his words and not a “cat on the wall” person to stay on in her life with the hope that he might be accepted someday, pretending to be her friend. He had enough scars in his life to have the clarity that it was unwise to stay friends with someone you loved. You always either end up hurting them and hating each other or you hurt yourself with each passing day.

He remembered the words from The Dark Knight - “You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the villain”.

And Aaryan chose to end it as a hero. He conveyed that he couldn’t be the friend she wanted but will always be there in case she needed. At Aaryan’s farewell, she gave him a final hug which would stay with him for the rest of his life as a symbol of their precious moments together, that he would cherish for the rest of his life. To be honest, I guess there were moments of tension whenever their eyes met during his farewell, but both were mature enough to not let it be a discomfort for the others.

And Aaryan flew, to chase another dream of his with just her memories and glimpses of the future they could have shared. But if its not to be, its not to be. You cannot force someone into a relationship and it never lasts even if you somehow manage to do so. So, he closed that door by respecting her choices and her own dreams for her future with no intention of intruding in her life again.

May be they were not meant for each other. Although, his gesture was sweet and love for her was true, there might have been some flaws in him which were beyond repair or acceptance. So with a heavy heart, I assume, she had to turn him down. As always, we never know for sure since this is Aaryan's version.

Everybody has their flaws and to find the acceptance and love of that deeply flawed self is what every human being wants. Aaryan was no different.

Someday, someone shall find his imperfections as the perfect match and there shall also be a “and they lived happily ever after” moment for him. And someday, Sheryl shall also find the man of her dreams and live happily ever after. I wish them both well and thank them for sharing this chapter of their life with me.

I shall be back with another episode of something interesting. Till then, Adios and Cheers!!