its only fair ..

I had just stepped into the other half of the world .

So far , I had a “ special “ attention on me all the time . I had enjoyed the unconditional love and the warmth of my family and friends . They were very supportive and helpful . In fact , they never let me do anything . Everything in my life was special and custom made , from the dress I wore to the bed I slept and so on . Everyone else had a two wheeler but I drove on all fours . Was given the priority wherever I went . I felt like a V.I.P when I didn’t even have to get up as the teacher came into the class . I didn’t have to find reasons for coming late to class .

The only thing which irritated me in this world was the way people exclaimed “oh! Poor kid ...” on seeing me. But I didn’t mind settling for that kind of a deal when I had so many cut-offs and preferences coming my way . I had tried to focus only on the water filled part of the glass and was quite successful until the day I shifted to a new school in 11^th.

I don’t know what makes people think that new-entries are a pushover . Like everybody else , I went through a rough patch trying to adjust to new environs and it got rougher when I was beaten up by a group of bullies at my school . Couldn’t do much except limp my way back home. The one bad thing about getting hurt is that the pain worsens with time. And this time it hurt more inside. It’s more of a guy thing when you’re suppressed. U just can’t take it. Something had to convince my sub-conscience and not let it deter. I tried to pity those guys for trying to establish their physical supremacy over me. I said to myself that I’ll forgive them in my heart and give a smile back at them to have them humiliated but I knew , I was talking crap. I wanted revenge . I would have dearly loved to beat them up and kick their ass if only the creator hadn’t made a mistake with my legs. But I didn’t have a choice.. Had to go for the stupid forgiving stuff. I hated it. For the first time, I missed being “normal”.

At some point of time the empty part of the glass had to unveil. I had been long broken but it hit me only now, breaking my confidence. The world left me crippled again. May be I had to discover my boundaries. I knew I can’t be impulsive and let my adrenaline pump high . When there is pretty much nothing you can do to help your cause, you start accepting things and move on. My world now had only two types of people , the ones who pitied on me and the ones whom I pitied upon. Life is a bed of roses, has both petals and thorns. I’m just happy that I have one foot lesser to step on the thorns.

Cheers J

“ a page from the diary of a physically challenged “