scribbled at 1 a.m

So often i've tried to think of so many other things to write about .. like emotions , pranks , happenings , family and so on .. But i come to a point called love and no more am able to think of anything else that i just mentioned before ..

I just sorta realised why so many love stories were made .. everything with a different aspect of it ... don't know how many more dimensions are yet to be added .. just to make it even more complicated ..

God is quite a genius ... to have created every girl so different from one another ... but they all have a common attribute .. their complexity .. so complicated and so sensitive ( half a guy's life is spent in asking sorry ) .. what are they ? unsolvable mysteries ??? atleast neo cube has a particular method which helps solve it easier .. but with women no one's got that option .. ( joey ! may be )

May be all these stupid thoughts won't be running on my mind if only i didn't have vinnaithaandi varuvaaya playing on my desktop right now ... man ! this movie has left quite an impression ..

Generally all girls .. but a specific kind of them are even more harder to handle .. the ones who are
1 . Bound by family traditions .. simply orthodox ..
2. Have an attitude , ego and stuff ..
3. Compulsive speakers of one's own self ..
4. Possess a changing mindset of course ! ( even mind readers won't help )
5. Repel on hearing words such as guys , love and u know what ..

But still we fall for them ..

And the way "these" girls transform men is amazing .. They literally make a guy to beg for a relationship which otherwise would be the last thing on a guy's mind .. Every guy has a Chandler " freaking out about commitment thing" in him .. wanting to just hang out with girls .. no relationship .. no strings attached .. no pain and all fun .. ( i certainly need to watch friends less !)

Normally .. you'll not be even friends with these people if only they had not landed up in the opposite sex .. But now that .. they are what they are .. i.e. GIRLS ..
you do tend to fall in love and convince yourself with a stupid logic which says " opposite poles attract " omg !!!! what do these girls possess ?? A magic whip of love or something ?
And you end up fighting and making up every other day until the day they desert you for their " family " .. ( yeah ! guys live on streets )

Now all you've got is pain and no fun .. and as days go by .. you kinda learn to live in that pain and infact you start enjoying it .. But thats how it is .. love .. so weird and so confusing ..
love at its complicated best ... cheers :)

It just happened ..

You can decide so many things in life .. you probably have a choice of a yes or a no .But relationships can be a bit tricky .. here u need the consent of two people to be in one .. sometimes even expectations to be met.. So many things matter .. from which college you study to which bike u own and the list is never ending ...

But perhaps if there is something in this world which is a "no strings attached " relationship , that definitely has to be friendship ..


But unfortunately not all friends get to stay in ur life forever .. some fade out with each and every phase of life .. people change with with changing backgrounds , statuses and similar worldly hype added into their life .. not all stay the same after they get their prestigious degrees and get tagged as CEOs , MDs etc ..


The friends who were with us when we were nothing stay with us forever .. This one is to all my friends who've been with me all along in this beautiful journey of life , just to make it more beautiful ...
And i want some of my close friends to stay with me forever at least in this web page of mine ..

To start with ..

Mohan : I don't remember a lot studying with this guy .. yeah , he did study in my class but we were more close off the school .. met him first while playing cricket and that was probably the bond which has kept us together all these years ... He's a Sachin maniac (who is not ) and is an Arsenal lover .. It was just about playing the whole time with us till we got into 11th when girls came into "our" picture .. He had girls around him all the time .. Had the charm capable of sweeping any girl off her feet .. may be I was noticed less coz I was with him :( but had a lot of fun pairing him with other girls .. so many that i almost lost count !!! but its not just cricket and girls , we shared everything ..its so much fun to read the previous sentence in a different way ;) My best buddy ever :)

Russel : Nick ! The craziest guy i've ever been friends with ,still am .. Could you imagine someone paying his own ticket to get to the land of troubles ??? well ! thats what russel is all about .. Man! He has such guts .. could talk his way "into" any trouble .. and his sarcasm,his biggest enemy .
Nobody in 12 B2 could ever forget Russel Nickson and especially our thala "jerry" .. If someone can come up with " the never ending tales of Russel and Jerry " , I bet it'd be the best comic series of all times .. And to u .. dude ! I believe that u still don't have a gf ..

Balaji : A simple , humble guy who has no probs getting along with other people .. nothing complex about his character .. such a selfless personality .. but no show off , nothing .Helps everyone around , may it be monetary or with one's studies .. wait a second ! this is starting to sound like a testimonial ..
what do u remember about balaji ? and ppl would immediately say .. He always mocks at others ..yeah .. you don't wanna be a girl when this guy is around and it gets worse when nick is there to his help .. mocks at anything and everything of girls .. u know what i'm talking about .. And may be its coz of this attitude that he has still not found his share of feminine attraction towards him ..


Sarat : This guy is currently trying to be ... I don't know what !! WE sat besides each other in school .. His innocent face makes people say " No way he could have been behind all this " .. and of course to his credit he has never been behind one .. a typical son of a maths professor who excels in studies .. but God knows what the hell is he doing in this stupid college of mine !!!! He didn want to go to an NIT .. homesick .. Is that what you call it ??? And for God sake change those gry and white uniform of yours .. We've been outta school for a long time now ..

Simbu : "This is what i want you to be" .. Any mom would say this to his mischevious kid . No girls .. No bad habits .. A clean and pure idiot who has been with me to make people ask " How can you be friends with him and still not change ??????"
Nothing interesting in his life so far worth a mention .. I'm still not sure about his character ..
He's just too good to be someone's boyfriend .. thats all you can say .. sorry machan ..

Kalpana : The only girl so far in my life who has made me feel comfortable around her .. I've always felt strange talking with girls .. its may be coz of the way they think , they react and put their pride and ego before everything else .. But before meeting her i could have never written the above lines , i just did ..
Girls are gr8 to hang out with when we share a " take for granted " relationship and thats exactly what we share .. She has been frank with me thro'out and may be thats why we are still friends :)
and to you .. please keep that "twilight"thing of yours down for atleast a while .. you're never gonna find a vampire to fall in love with ...

refresh your pages of friendship and u'll find similar characters and loads of fun :)
cheers

P.S : Inspired by a "so called "friend :)

If only I knew . . .

Life is so cruel sometimes. It never gives you a chance to recover and regain things that you’ve lost.

Don’t worry! This time its not about love . . .

I was in NIT, Trichy for their cultural festival " FESTEMBER'10 " . Things were so grand and the preparations for the big event of ' pronite ' where Naresh Iyer was to sing along with Anuradha Sriram was in full swing.

That is something you don’t often get to see and something you don’t even dream about happening in your college if you hail from a college like mine . . . By this time you must have known how stupid and childish my college was if you had read my previous posts.

People often tell you " College is not something as you see in movies " but with NITs it was not so, they were even better.

I thought I could take a look around the college before the event. It took me nearly 2 hrs of walk across that 700 acre paradise and still I had not seen it all.

What do the NITs not have ??

I was in mixed emotions. I was awed at all those wonderful things I had seen and was also in sort of a grief as to what all my college lacked . . .

There was almost everything . . . from swimming pool to a cricket ground with training nets to music clubs to exclusive dance floors . . . Name it and it was there. And the most important thing I hadn’t seen any chudidars. Doesn’t mean there were not any girls but just that they were so fashionable and lively ( very much unlike my place ).

I tried not to bring that " comparison thing " in my mind. But on seeing these, I just couldn’t help cursing my college for what it was not. I came across a big computer centre with almost 5000 systems, all with internet and that was it !! . I had reached my saturation point and couldn’t take any of this " not my college thing ". Mine hardly had 5 systems with internet ( To dig in deep, they took an eternity to even load the GOOGLE home page ). . .

After slamming my college in my head and saying that F word atleast a 100 times, I walked really jealous to my friend’s room in the hostel to vent my anger and frustration a bit. I lay on his bed for a few minutes after which I heard a roar. I came outta the room and there was a street football match within the hostel.

Now to all of us who haven’t been in hostel, I tell you . . . Our life sucks ! Nothing like being a hosteller ( Not in my college, ofcourse ). There is nothing you can’t get in a hostel. Fun being the prime. I enjoyed night life to the core.

Inter-hostel LAN counterstrike tournaments, Street football, any time-whatever download, alternate day water supply, open terrace booze parties, mid night meet at Nescafe, hanging out with girls any time and everytime, North vs South cricket matches and common room EPL celebrations . . . Man ! Hostel life is so heavenly. What a loser I am !!

Now not only am I stuck in a school-like college, where people onnnnly study ( Even schools have extra-curriculars nowadays ) but to make it worse, I am a day-scholar ( Fuck ! I don’t deserve to be called a scholar even that way )

The best thing about any National Institute is the mixture of people you get to meet, a multi-cultural society. These colleges do serve as a window to the world ahead. Just imagine college life with a North-Eastern friend and a Punjabi kudi as a gf or from any other cultural background for that case. I miss every bit of a " Real " college life . . .

And the reason for all this being nobody but me. If only I had had a glimpse of my college in my 12^th, I would have not taken my entrance exams so lightly. And guess with what was I punished for my laziness? ? A college life which sucks !!!

But nothing is gonna change, as the saying goes " jo ho gaya, so ho gaya ". I consoled myself and entered the Barn to see Naresh Iyer rock the show. The crowd went gaga as Naresh Iyer sang Roo-bar-oo-oo-oo . . . Roshini . . . I along with the crowd joined him and that gave me some relief as I left NIT with a thought that I’ve also lived as an NITian ( Though not for long ).

Wise men learn from others’ experiences. I guess you are wise. Now am not gonna let another opportunity pass by and irritate you all once again saying " If only I knew . . . ".

Lets ....

It was a boring Monday afternoon. There was nothing good on TV, all idiotic soaps were being telecasted. I sat on my couch with cushions on either side to make myself more comfortable. I wondered if I had bunked college just to get bored through the afternoon as I kept switching the channels. There was a debate on one of the channels regarding unemployment.

I couldn't hear things properly as there was some drainage channel reconstruction going on in my street. I increased the volume as a participant in the debate said " There are still 10.7% people unemployed in India. "

I heard a faint voice outside my door shouting " Anna ! Anna !! ". I switched the TV off and opened my french window to see who it was. There was a small boy around 12 yrs of age with a torn T-shirt and half pants covered with dirt and mud all over him. His knees were scrapped and he had a small cloth over his head like a militant.

I went near him and he said " Anna , thanni anna !! ", handing me a bottle. I asked him to wait him in the shade and came back with the bottle of water. He drank some and ran away to hand it over to the other workers in the construction. I could see many small children, probably not even 14 working hard in the scorching sun. I was disheartened to see such a mile's difference in the lives of people of almost the same age group. I ran into my house with a heavy heart to see as to what sort of a life, I led. Just moments back, I was sitting in a comfortable recliner, with a 36" samsung LCD infront of me and an AC to keep me away from the heat. And there were those kids with no time to sit, earning their bread at the cost of their precious childhood and schooling. It was like heaven and hell kept just 100m away. What a disgrace !

Then I remembered the debate and that 10.7% unemployment thing. If we have those many people unemployed, then why do these children ever work ?

We discuss about the BlackBerry service in India, the Nuclear liability Bill and so on over the air, but still the basic educational needs of a child remains unfulfilled. These children don't care if the MPs get their hike or not nor if the whole cricketing world is in a shock of
" spot-fixing ". All that these kids are concerned is about getting atleast one square meal a day and something to cover their body.
Why would someone care to quench his thirst for knowledge when he can't eat to just survive ?

People say today's children are the future of India. But a depressing fact is that the future of India is still serving as labourers.

Every child is special. Just that so often one is deprived of the opportunity to even realize his potentials . . . Oh yes ! Child labour has been completely eradicated in India !! If this statement is not true, LETS . . . . . .

Single, Yet again :)

" Men can never be friends with the women they find attractive. "

And I was no exception . I too, fell for this beautiful girl, a junior at my college.
The 1st step for modern love is friendship. Though it may not last long, we all wish that in the so called " friendship " period, it turns into a relationship ( may or may not be love ).
And it so did for me. I was good enough to woo her and soon my status " Single " upgraded to " Committed ".

Everything seemed to be very interesting and new for the first few months. But once I start seeing her, I saw my world turn upside down. I did everything to make her happy. But I soon realised that making a woman happy is not just hard but nearly impossible.

Looking back at the six months I had spent with her, it is kinda weird. There was a clear influence of a woman . I missed my freedom, which the girls would rather prefer to call senseless, disordered, etc. .
In my effort to make her happy, I had lost all my happiness. Small small things which make a guy's world weren't mine any more.

A 7 rupee coffee at the Nescafe now cost me over 40 at the CCD. ( Not to forget that I was the one supposed to be paying for her !! )
Seeing the mobile, show " Balance 0.04 Rs " is indeed a pleasure I was so deprived of. Believe me ! for the first time in my life, I recharged for 500 bucks and it stayed that way all the six months.

I no longer played in my college football matches just because I had to meet her " EVERY EVENING ". I literally was dropped from the team which I hated the most.
There is one thing about being in a relationship, you sacrifice things saying to yourself " C'mon !! its only for her " but they just don't seem to give a damn about it.

I attended stupid b'day parties of her friends with just TV and popcorn as my sole companions. After all, it was a girls' night out :(

I missed all the ManU matches which I used to watch with my friends at the pub just because she'd want me to chat with her on gtalk all night. And due to this I was getting away and away from my friends, who left me out on all their Discos and Parties. I had been labelled " the phone guy ".

I was forced to watch stupid Hrithik Roshan and Madavan movies. 3 movies per month in PVR cinemas almost burnt a hole in my purse. I was so much outta my mind !!

I ate more chocolates and ice creams in these six months than in my whole life put together. They had been my last options, if not starve.
I bought her a " Teddy " for her b'day. The shop-keeper asked me " Girlfriend ? " . I must have said " yes, I'm so stupid ". And not only that my room was getting cleaner and neater. The clothes and books weren't messed up anymore. I even arranged flowers in my vase. Such a" woman " thing !! My deospray had turned into a cologne and I was shaving regularly.

Once you get into a relationship, in order to impress her you do a lot of things which you would not do otherwise. You try to be more decent and selective with the words you use. Being sarcastic was my way of being fun but now that was the one thing I could never do. Like I said " Please stay honey !! Please " when I actually thought " Please get out. You've bored me enough "
" You've a pleasant taste. My room now looks just beautiful !! ", which should have been " C'mon you lady !! can't you add more pink to my room. This sucks !! ".
" Dear, can you get me another brownie please ... " and I said " sure ! anything for you honey ! " ( of course ! my mistress, you're yet to pay me my 5 months' salary )
" Is there anything I can do about this ? " ... " No its fine baby ! It wasn't your fault " ( Fuck off you lady, you've ruined my life already. What more can you do to me ? )

All these were okay to some extent, but more importantly I hadn't hit on a girl for so long now !! :( :( which was the worst.

" Oh God ! what has this girl done to me ? ? ", I asked myself.
I had said YES to her the whole time and the 1st time I said a NO, we had a fight. I blew it up on purpose and had my cherished SINGLE status back. It was such a struggle !!
( I still miss the hugs and kisses though :( )
" Of course ! you gotta lose something to win something " and in this case it was my freedom and
a " Man's world " that I had won.
I hadn't checked out on anyone in these days and so now ladies here I am,
" HOW YOU DOING ;) ?? "

Not Again :(

Sometimes dwelling on your past can be too bad and its even worse for his friend. You'll see why . .

Arjun: My life is so fucked up. And today !!! ( Takes a shot )
Rahul: C'mon man !! u're doing no good by drinking this much . . .
Arjun: ( To the bartender ) one more large pls . . .
Rahul: one more ? ? ? now wait !!! wat happened this time ?
Arjun: Don't you know ?
Rahul: Oh ! Its her again ? NOOOOOO!!!
Arjun: Hey!! I'm the one supposed to be freaked out here . Not u !!
Rahul: We've just had this a week back . I can't go through the same thing yet again . Well ! guess what . I'm leaving .
Arjun: Then pay your bill and leave .
Rahul: okies !! i'll stay then . ( To the bartender ) one more for me . So what today ? Saw her again ?
Arjun: Yeah !! was leaving home after the movie . I was so happy till then .
Rahul: So what ? you're sad now that you saw her ??
Arjun: Not that !! whenever i see her, the whole thing just runs into my mind .
Rahul: You can't forever think of that . Forget her !!
Arjun: Forget her ?Well, how? how can I ??
Rahul: ( Takes a sip ) C'mon dude ! like you were not even in a relationship with her.
Arjun: But it was budding stages and i spoilt all the 8 years of friendship that we shared .
Rahul: Friendship ? dude, you were in love with her from the moment you saw her in school.
Arjun: I was , but may be she didn know that !!
Rahul: She had to know that one day . . . and when she did, she left you .
Arjun: I believed her friend would not tell her . I was wrong :(
Rahul: No . . . you were just trying out your luck . Don't blame it all on you . Things like these happen .
Arjun: We were so good till then !!
Rahul: Good what ? Good lovers ? you guys were just friends . She was way too conservative for you . May be she wasn't your " ONE " .
Arjun: But i can't get her outta my system . How do i forget her ?
Rahul: I'll tell you what ? Just think of her as something really bad . . .
Arjun: Like what ? A bitch ????
Rahul: May be !!
Arjun: No !! She wasn't a bitch . I can't think of her that way . It wasn't her fault, it was all mine .
I shouldn't have told her friend at all . May be her friend WAS a Bitch .
Rahul: However many times you say that , that ain't gonna make you feel any better . Just get over her . . .
Arjun: Is there anyway I can get her back ??
Rahul: NOOOO !!! Like she hasn't spoken to you for 4 years now and you've done everything to convince her . Its not gonna workout dude !!
Arjun: Can't you say something soothing ? But you're right . Its really stupid to spend all my time thinking of someone who doesn't even wanna see my face .
Rahul: Now you sound more sane ! way to go dude . . .
Arjun: yeah ! from now on am not even gonna think about her . . .



( A WEEK LATER )


Arjun: She was beautiful today !!
Rahul: NOT AGAIN !!! :( ( Takes a shot )

back to kindergarten

" you'll be suspended , debarred , dismissed ! "

Have you ever had to hear all these words ?

well i have , and that too for the most criminal act of TALKING in the class .

Stupidity ! isn't it . well that's what my college is all about ..

Once i was caught talking in the class and i , along with a few others , were dragged to the most dreaded disciplinary committee (even worse than the disco in five point someone) .

On my way there i was asking to myself "wait a second .. are these people insane ? or have they gone nuts ? "

Well we all come to college to meet friends , chat and enjoy with them ( if not all , atleast i did , just for that ) and its inhuman to stop us from doing what we love to .. (the prof was lecturing though )

so the disciplinary committee ..

the set up was as thou' if i had entered a police station (just the khaki was missing) . Questions were fired from all directions asking me the reason for this so called crime of mine .. talking .

If the counsellor there had known the fairer sex better .. he w'd have known that chatting didn require any special reasons ..

well ! half an hour into the enquiry , i was standing there half asleep , listening to those impractical punishments which i had mentioned at the start .. i didn know how to react to that idiot who was blowing up the lamest issue on earth .. it was like an acting course for me where i was supposed to act guilty and control my laughter .

he accused me of almost every possible mistake in the world . Thanks to the PWD .. his water supply was still on . else i would have been accused of that too ..

like all proud prof he too shared (actually boasted) an experience of his where he had suspended a student for five days .. ( i thought of fetching him a place in the guiness book of records .. what an achievement ! )

So , at the end of it , we negotiated and i was asked to give an letter which read as follows ..

To

The Counsellor,

Disciplinary committee ,

PEC , Pondicherry

From

Dinesh.S

2nd , B.Tech ,

Mech.Engg.

PEC .

Respected Sir ,

I've been found guilty of talking , poking ma neighbour,disturbing the class , staring the lec. in the class continuously .

I hereby undertake and pledge that i'll not continue such actions .. and if found guilty again , i promise to bring my parents and also pay a fine of rs 500 .

thanking you wholeheartedly ,

yours faithfully,

dinesh .

well ! i didn mean a single word in the letter .. and so am saving the fine amount for the next crime ..

guys .. please do believe .. im in a college (which has just turned out to be worser than a kindergarten ) ..

the poet in me

well .. i hadn discovered the poet residing in me until i knew emotions .. infact expressing emotions . Poems have now become my inevitable tools( weapons actually ) to express ma emotions better. so just thought why not prick you guys with this first ever collection of mine .. ( sorry if i'm lame )

why me ?

she walked into ma life ..

just to leave her footprints behind ..

in gutters

now i'm alone ..

for she was the queen of ma heart's throne ..

and if she had , had well known

she wouldn have had me thrown .. in gutters

Angels ?

i was not able to define angels ..

till the moment i saw her .

Silence kills

she uttered no word ..

but killed me without a sword .

against me she used no violence ..

but just silence .

Roads of life

so much complicated is this world ..

at every stage its mysteries unfold ,

thousands of roads it has to offer ..

but not all are as crunchy as wafer .

so choose the road by your heart ..

else .. you might lose life's most thrilling part .

Into my life

she came into ma life like a drop of dew ..

girls like her were so very few ..

her smile made my heart melt ..

may be in love i was i felt .

Teen cycle

quite fascinating she was

no beauty could ever surpass

my world had taken a pause ..

as gentle as breeze she crossed ..

but .. all these thoughts had washed

and my heart had her instantly lost .

to her friend had switched over my focus ..

my eyes followed her and traced her locus ..

c'mon ! a man's heart is like a monkey new born ..

and this cycle of mine kept on and on and on ..

untiring love

to me you are so much dear

ma efforts to reach you will never tire

you is all i desire ..

for

you set ma heart on fire ..

crazy world

love is the way to heart break city ..

but so willing are people .. man! its a pity ..

Thank you

thank you ,

for not returning my smile

for not talking even when i had tried a 1000 times

for avoiding me at all possibilities

for neglecting whenever you saw me

for not revealing the secret of a woman's heart

for teaching me to live without you

and finally

thank you for whatever i'm today

.. dinesh ..

and now it'd be completely unfair on my part if i had failed to thank you all for spending and wasting your worthfull time of yours on this nonsense of mine . Keep it up .

YOUNGER PRESSURE

This one is for all those younger brothers who've a much more successful sibling ...

"Being the youngest child in the family is a blessing ."

I too believed in this until i got into the world of competition. May be its my life , but people around me want it to shape their way ..

Failure is no longer decided by us . It is the society which decides it . Thank God ! I'm blessed with parents who've not forced me into things which i'm reluctant about . Nor have they compared me with my elder one .

But the circle around you can be so cruel , comparing and intimidating at times when you find yourself somewhere below the levels set by your own bro ...

It all started when i secured lesser marks than my bro in the 10th board exams . 93% is not that poor by any standards , but of course was by the standards my bro had set . People around looked down upon me as if i was earning my bread at their mercy ...

This was my first step into the world of comparison , my first experience of an unexplicable feeling and i experienced the same for the next 2 years also . Whatever i did i was then compared with my bro and i was accused of being below par with my bro .

Man ! i got all screwed up with this as i found even illiterate relatives of mine talking about my weakness in organic chemistry as compared to my bro ..

I've always wanted my bro to be successful in whatever he did but then i cursed him for the marks he secured in organic chemistry ..

"The comparison thing " was driving me mad .

The next big so called failure occurred when my bro got into NIT and me in PEC , a decent college but not as good as a NIT .

People in Pondicherry have always considered PEC a haven . My relatives are elated when i say i do my mechanical engg. in PEC but sneer, when they find my bro in NIT, which just is just disgusting .

Goodness , i got into mech engg. .Else i would have been accused of getting into the benches of TCS in my later years .

I can bear all this . But man ! who wants to study in a " local " college where you are always under the scanner of being seen around with girls or may be in a pub . I seriously wanted to get outta home , but unfortunately just didn't happen .

This was not the worst part . The way i feel whenever my bro tells me how he hangs around with chicks , boozes , bunks classes , plays football all the while makes me " really jealous " .

Whenever he comes home for his sem holidays , i'll have to act his porter and driver . I would have to buy his favourites ( which include .. you know what) . Serve him like a waiter as my mom says " your poor bro , he gets to come home only for a week " . King at college and King at home . Blessed ? who me ?

Man ! he must be the happiest person .

Comparison and playing the host were better devils ...

but now i've got a nightmare to deal with ...

just yesterday my mom put a laddu in my mouth saying " your bro has been placed in HCL tech. for 4 l.p.a " .

My bro being placed was in fact welcome but just that pay made the laddu harder for me to digest .

2 years into coll and i knew that my campus hadn't got someone recruited for even half the pay as my bro .

Now i don't want the cycle to go on once again and people (half of them unemployed ) calling me a failure ... yet again .

And this pressure to perform and get a job is driving me crazy .

... Hopes still alive ...

Y is 13 unlucky?

"Nothing in the world could ever stop me from seeing her,
not even my own eyes."

She had me literally, attracted at worst and mesmerized at best...

Her eyes were nothing less powerful than a magnet. I fell for her instantly ...
( Man! gotta fall if you've never had a gal friend!).

Who, in the world, ever knew how a girl felt on seeing a guy ... ( a handsome one like me .. lolz )

My eyes were magnetized and I kept looking at her ...( who cares the teacher !).

One beautiful rainy evening, she came upto me and asked me out. I was awe struck.
I felt as if i had achieved the purpose of my birth. I couldn just wait one moment to lift her up, and go sing a dreamy duet. But I kept up my pride and asked her if i could reply her in a day.(literally! Accept after a day!)

So, coffee day 4:30 pm, sunday, 13/05/07 . She came in a cute blue salwar.

I had'n believed one bit in superstition till then but from then on 13 became my lucky number, sunday my fav. day and blue my lucky colour.

But all these superstitions and happiness lasted just for a period of 6 months.

On 13th nov. 2007, she came up to me and said something which has been hurting me even now ... Infact for the past 2 yrs 3 months & 13 days.

"I don't feel the same love for you anymore "

she said.

I then knew why people considered 13 unlucky.

Magnets had stopped attracting and now..
nothing in the world could ever possibly bring me to see her.

Not even my own eyes...

Not everybody who claimed 13 unlucky might have had a reason. But now, I did.

C'mon. She was not the only girl and 13 was not the only number.

So what if 13 was unlucky?

I took my next girl friend for a date on the 14th ...

(No marks for guessing that this time she stayed !!)

~Deepu~

Integrated and Differentiated

This one is for all those who had struggled with their mathematics paper in their higher sec. just as i did ...


date : 25 august 2008

I was excited . I was about to enter my college life. School had been fun throughout(except for the fact that i had no girls in my school .. )
I went back to the days when i h'd experienced a similar excitement .. when i was about to enter h.sc . I had scored 93% in my 10th board exams . And maths was so much easier till i entered 11th . I had already been terrified about integration and differentiation by my seniors at school . But who would care if one had scored cent percent marks in maths earlier .
Things don't change in a day . But in my case it was not to be . Right from day 1 i didn't understand a bit of differentiation nor integration but thought i c'd improve during the study holidays . I failed in the exams and literally nothing but my over-confidence had fucked me ..
I'd been differentiated in parts and maths had split me apart . Who w'd imagine some one falling into a deep pit from a cliff..
My maths prof. often said " you are a comedian if you don't fight the battle of Integration and Differentiation ". But who w'd wanna die in the battle as a hero when i c'd survive as a comedian .

Exams passed by, but i didn't .. Maths had never been so complicated . And who c'd forget the days before the public exams when i burnt the midnight oil, differentiating and integrating .
And to everyone's surprise i'd cleared the maths paper .. I thanked God a hundred times and jumped in joy .. oooph .. i never did want to see those 2 topics anymore in my life .

But this happiness did not last for long . I opened my 1st sem syllabus book just to find the topic ..

" MULTIPLE INTEGRATION AND DIFFERENTIATION " .. yet again


deepu

the day i saw her

I realised a fact much later in ma life ..
we hang out wid gals de whole day .. go out for treats ..
bunk classes and what not
but not all gals take our heart along ..
this was the first ever poem i'd written after seeing this gal..
(just bear with me .. )

I had never seen , as beautiful a face
Gotta say, she had a grace ..

If i had known de power of her eyes
I wouldn have had a look at them twice ..

She passed me , n i had a look
And away from me , ma heart , she took ..

She blushed , n had ma heart melt
In love i was wid her , i felt ..
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